You know those times when you do something that's, umm.... kind of stupid, and after it happens you hope no one heard you - so you sit there in silence, waiting, except it's not actually in silence, because you really did hurt yourself so you are wincing and kind of gasping a little in pain? And of course your husband heard the thud and can hear the whinging and is coming to see what happened because despite his repeated "are you ok's?", you still haven't answered. Then he finds you on the floor outside of the bathroom door and he lovingly helps you up and is kind of laughing a little but is seriously thinking, what the shit just happened? You really don't want to tell him, but you are actually hurt and have to limp away and he won't quit with the asking. You contemplate lying, but really, no lie you can come up with in a split second will explain the ridiculousness of the whole thing, which is when you realize you have to tell the truth. But it's soooo stupid.
Did you trip over this.... hat??
I got my toe caught in the leg of my pants as I was walking and it tripped me and I think my toe is broken now.
What??? He replies. I can't even guess what you mean.
My toe. It got caught in my pant leg. As I was walking. And it tripped me. I also hurt my knee when I landed on it.
Seriously? You are being serious?
OMG YES! I'm serious. It hurts. Look. It's purple!!! Leave me alone.
I sat there for a few minutes. He helped Maizey, which was what I was on my way to do. I've wiggled my purple and throbbing big toe a few times and it actually really hurts. I'm almost laughing about it. Almost.
Could you have come up with a better story than that? Even now, an hour later, I can't come up with anything.
Hopefully I can fit in my shoe in the morning, I have six miles to run.
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