Sunday, February 26, 2012

When Things Get Weird

Its been a weird week in our house.
Things that have needed to be done but have been sitting untouched for weeks are finally finished, yet things that normally get done immediately have been tossed to the wayside. As in, Maizeys bed hasn't been made for three nights now. Like, no sheets at all. Just a receiving blanket underneath her and her comforter over top. I'm blaming my laziness on the fact that I have been busy doing other things. Yet piles of dirt and dust are migrating to the corners of the living room waiting for spring to come, so I can plant the box of potatoes that I let sprout, in them, so I guess I haven't been doing that either. 
Maizey broke out in this weird funky hives thing... it lasted three days and seems to be gone now. Bizarre random allergic reaction? Virus? Who knows?? She didn't seem bothered until every night at 10:30 when she suddenly needed to be thisclose to me. Benadryl worked wonders. Still have no idea what the heck it was, but we will be watching from now on.
I have been fighting something... not sure what, but I am kicking this bitch in the face - water and vitamin c have become my new best friends. My husband has picked up the slack on most other things that needed picking up so as to let me sleep. I'm the mom, there is no time for me to be totally down and out. It feels like the last time I was sick, which was in college and it was strep throat. Seriously, no thanks. 
Unproductive weeks are always followed by super productive and over achieving weeks, so as long as I can beat whatever this is, then this should be a great week.
Here's to hoping. I am over this weirdness.

Saturday, February 18, 2012

The One Where Jace Is Little

Okay, so the bottom line is, if I were a dairy cow, I would be sold. 
The thing is, they look good, my milk producers. They look like they should be pumping out gallons and that it should be more than enough to supply one little boy with an adequate amount to eat. But I guess it ends at looks, cuz these baby's apparently just don't cut it.
The same thing happened when Maizey was this age. The difference is that she never cried. Like, ever. So we had no idea that something was wrong. Jace, on the other hand... oh we knew something was wrong. My formerly sweet and amazing sleeping baby was suddenly miserable and never sleeping. He cried all the time.
I didn't want to use the boob as a way to soothe him. I didn't want him to only be dependent on me. I didn't want to create a monster that couldn't be put down.
I should've just fed him.
My supply dropped and he wasn't getting enough to eat.
At his four month well baby visit our Doctor noticed that he was down a bit percentage wise. After what happened with Maizey she wanted me to keep an eye on it. We had his shots lined up for two weeks later so just be sure we paid attention then and if he was still down or had gone any lower to come back. At his shots last week, he was still down. All the way down to the 30th percentile from the 50th.
BUT it had been a long week after our dr's appointment and before the shots, so after talking to some friends about it, one that had to stop nursing all together at four months because of no milk and one that is now topping up with formula alongside nursing, I decided to be proactive and work on increasing supply on my own before having to resort to formula. (It should be said that I have nothing against formula, it's just that I am cheap and have no desire to pay for food when it could be free.) And before our doctor had to get involved.
I have started a rigorous routine of pumping every night to try and trick my body. I also have started feeding every two hours whether he wants it or not. I feel like I am back in the newborn days where every day revolves around feeding and pumping.
He's crying a lot less, more like a normal amount, and he is back to sleeping more. He actually naps now and he only gets up once maybe twice a night.
It has already gotten better, much, much better and I am not giving up. We are SO close to starting solids, I just have to hold on for a bit longer and then we'll be out of the woods anyways. He will be fine. No, he IS fine. He is eating so much more already. A little dip, that's all this is.
I love when this little face smiles...


Wednesday, February 15, 2012


(Monday night I was cooking dinner and on the phone with Andrea, who has 3 kids and one on the way so she knows all about what can happen when you turn your back, distracted)

Mom, I don't like this juice.

Uh, what juice? There isn't any juuuicee...

(shirt covered in something that is not clear like water...)

This juice. I don't like it. 

What are talking about? Show me please.
Ahhhh MISSY!!!!!!!!


I don't blame you Missy, I wouldn't like to drink that "juice" either. 


Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentines Day (aka VD)

I'm neither here nor there about Valentines Day (although I do think it's funny when people that hate it refer to it as VD, heh). I could go along with the notion that you shouldn't really need a specific day to celebrate your loved ones, that you should just show your love all the time ( not like, you know, show it in some literal way...), but I can also get on board with the idea that having a day that is all about love is just a little incentive to go all out with pda's, gifts, extra smooches or what have you.



In my eight Valentines Days with Brian there has been a moderate amount of attention paid to it - never nothing and never over the top. Which is cool with me.



Although, I do like making memories with my kids so in celebration of the day I decided we'd make some heart shaped cookies. We were all set to start when I realized there was not a single bite of butter in our house. None. How does that even happen?? Sheesh. So first thing this morning we headed to the grocery store.



Right there as we walked in the store was a giant Valentines Day area - flowers, chocolate, balloons, candy. It screamed 'Right here men that didn't plan anything earlier than the morning of, now you have to pay $20 bucks for this bouquet of flowers that was only $8 yesterday'


We wandered the store and every stand that we walked by sat perched with heart shaped boxes filled with nothing special candy at over inflated prices. Maizey wanted to pick up every single box.

           Uh, no Missy, We have those same chocolates at home, it's just that they are in regular packaging and therefore you could care less about them. 

The more we wandered the store, the more inadequate I started to feel. I hadn't put together packages for the kids, I hadn't even made them a card. Hell I hadn't even bought a card. For Brian either. There were no little Valentines cards to give to her friends. We hadn't done any cute crafts. Nothing. Here I was looking at all the pretty pink and red boxes and wishing I had just bought something at least. We walked to the cards and picked one out for Daddy from them and from me. Julie (you all know her, right?) (she works at the grocery store) gave Maizey a red balloon with hearts on it and seriously, I think she thought she had died and gone to heaven. She wore that sucker on her wrist like the proudest little girl you have ever seen. We got the butter and went home.



We made the cookies. We made the shit out of those cookies. We rolled dough and cut hearts, we watched at the door of the oven just to make sure everything was okay in there. We made icing and licked beaters and then sat at the table and squished delicious pink icing out of a ziplock bag onto our perfect little cookies.




We spent the whole day as a family, including the trip to Public Heath for Jaces four month shots (he weighed in at 14lbs 14ounces... no longer a giant, just a little perfect boy, but  more on that later). We went for a late afternoon walk in the sun. It felt very much like an early Spring day.




 (I am just going to go ahead and nickname this walk The walk of the sun flare - holy schnitke they were amazing, between every house, every tree and mountain out there!)

Maizey wore shoes and jumped in every puddle she could find. We invited Brians parents over for dinner and they stayed until after the kids were in bed.
Jace obviously couldn't care less what day it was and Maizey, well she knew (and announced about a billion times) that it was Valentines! Day! but in reality, all she really knew was that it was a super fun day with cookies and walks and coffee and no nap and a balloon and fun fun fun.


(love this action shot - hat falling off and everything)


   I don't often have those feelings of inadequacy but when they sneak up, they are ugly. And for what? Honestly. A day that should make you feel good?? It was stupid and unnecessary and luckily, passed very quickly.



We had a great day. Perfect actually. I have always known that we don't need much to make us happy and today just reconfirmed it. One little batch of cookies and a big walk and my girl could not be happier (or more exhausted after coming down from the sugar high). I know that it's not pretty packaged candy and expensive flowers that take a day from normal to awesome, but really just spending a quality day together being a family and expressing how much we love each other with our words and actions is all that it takes.


No, I don't NEED a specific day to do that, but I did take THIS specific one to do it and it turned out pretty damn great.


Happy Valentines Day to my little family. I love you all with my whole heart.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Saturday Shoes

Just an average Saturday morning in this house.




What? You don't wear your moms shoes around the house in your p.j's?

*these photos are all super heavily edited because my camera settings were wayyyy off. Not my finest photography. Cute none the less*

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Swimming Together

For two whole years I had a little side-kick. Just me and her. We ran errands, had coffee, grocery shopped, walked, played, watched tv, cooked, ate and talked together. Rarely did I go anywhere without her. We have made many a roadtrip just the two of us.
She has been the source of entertaining stories and solid conversations for a long time. She is fun to have around.


Every Saturday all summer long we hit the Modern for coffee and a muffin, then head to the farmers market for whatever we can find and then we look for garage sales and see what kind of treasures await us.
Of course it all changed when Jace came along. There wasn't as much free time, timing is harder when you are juggling a nursing baby and suffering from new-babe exhaustion. Plus carrying a car seat while holding a toddlers hand while carrying a hot coffee is not as easy you'd think. She didn't seem to notice that the one on one attention had been tossed to the side or that we don't make it out as much as we used to. On the rare occasion that we are leaving without Jace she always asks why he's not coming. She likes having him around.


But I noticed.
I sometimes miss the just me and her time. Where walking down the street is a little easier and where no one has to stand at the side of the table bouncing a bucket seat in an attempt to soothe a crying baby (read: me) while trying to gracefully shove a sausage roll into her mouth. Although, if I am being honest that time is normally spent wiping up spilled cups of water and running some one to the bathroom for the third time in half an hour anyways, so it's not like its actually easier.



I decided to enroll Maizey in swimming lessons one evening in January. It was a Saturday night and lessons started the following Wednesday. Just me and her. I had to go in the water with her, so I couldn't take Jace with me. So for two days a week over the last four weeks we have packed our suits and hit the pool. She loves swimming and loved the time with me. We always spend a few minutes in the hot tub after class, warming up and relaxing.


When classes ended on Friday I had planned to take Maizey out for breakfast, again just the two of us, to celebrate, but timing with Brian being in didn't work out so Jace was with Brians mom and she isn't super comfortable just packing him up and bringing him to me if he needed me.


So we postponed until Saturday morning, but then Brian was home and it felt wrong not inviting him, so it wound up being all of us.


Over thick slices of french toast, greasy omelets and hot coffee we toasted to Maizey, for being a big girl and learning to swim and for just being YOU. 


I know she is fine, shes not jealous of him nor does she feel left out or in desperate need for attention. I just needed to satisfy my own craving for a little Missy time. She felt special and I feel re-connected. Which is exactly what I was aiming for.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Jumping Jace

Jaces first time in the jolly jumper... he was a total pro! Loves this thing. LOVES.

It gives me enough free minutes to do a lot of things. Thank you jumper gods.