Sometimes my kids teach me to let go of expectations and ideas and just BE.
Friday I had planned on going to town and stopping for a coffee with my friend Paola whom I haven't been able to catch up with (like really catch up) for weeks and weeks. I had all the things I needed to get done planned out and we woke up with plenty of time to get out the house reasonably early. But we woke up to a little girl with the flu. It is heartbreaking to see your kids sick, she's never been sick before and I'm sure she was wondering what the deuce was going on. She informed me numerous times that she was birsty and needed some milk. It was sad.
We were without a daddy all day so there was no chance of a trip to town alone. It meant no groceries, no mail, no coffee or visit, no.... other things that seemed really important at the time. I was annoyed at having to stay home all day. Which made me annoyed at myself for being annoyed. I had plans and expectations and truth be told, just really wanted to go. I leave the house every day. We walk, we do errands, we do menial little crap that fills up time. We do things we have to and things we want to. I go alone. I go with one kid. I go with both kids. It's just what I do. But I had a sick little girl who wanted to curl up on the couch under warm, Nana knit afghans and watch 101 Dalmatians. She wanted to sit on my lap and snuggle. She was happy to be close to me. I finally let go of the idea that she would be better in the afternoon and we could go then. And this amazing thing happened. I relaxed. I put comfy clothes back on and dug a container of chicken broth out of the depths of the freezer for some good old homemade chicken noodle soup. I read stories and played with Dora. We watched 101 Dalmatians twice and she watched countless episodes of Backyardigans. I only went out to fill the furnace and change the chickens water. I was being the mama she needed me to be. It felt right and good. What could possibly be more important than that?
She woke up the next day much better.
Sunday she woke up sick again, but that's what Sundays are for right? To stay home.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Monday, November 7, 2011
Warnings And Love
My two year old comes with a warning.
She doesn't play by the rules, she makes her own.
She argues, but don't take it personally because she even argues with herself. Or her fingers when she is trying to hold up two and only two. "No thumb, you don't stay up, I put you down, stop it"
She isn't quiet, she does not have an inside voice, even in the middle of the night.
She can take a perfectly acceptable two year old activity and turn it into a nightmare. Fact: If you give her two felts *non toxic of course* with a picture to color and get her all set up in her high chair so she can't color on anything that will get ruined, she WILL suck all the color out of the markers and then bite the tip off the end.
She never stops talking. Ever. Even in her sleep.
My new word for her is spirited.
I get frustrated at her, I threaten spankings, I put her in her room, I take things away. I am consistent with discipline and I don't entertain the arguing, I stop it.
She fights with her friends and her cousins. While I would like to be that parent that thinks its always the other kids fault, I am no dummy. I know better.
I didn't think I would ever need the "excuse" shes two, but I am guilty of using it. I have no other explanation for her behavior sometimes. She will be fine one minute and a beast the next. And it's not learned behavior, trust me, I keep my beastiness in check!!
But then...
then she is kind and loving and gentle and quirky and funny.
She shares and says please and thank you without being asked. She says grown-up things and laughs at jokes. She asks thoughtful questions. She says sorry and means it.
She sings songs from her favorite movies and quotes characters like Simba and Dori. She learned what a best friend is thanks to the Lion King and often tells me I am her best friend.
She comes with a warning, but I do love her so.
She doesn't play by the rules, she makes her own.
She argues, but don't take it personally because she even argues with herself. Or her fingers when she is trying to hold up two and only two. "No thumb, you don't stay up, I put you down, stop it"
She isn't quiet, she does not have an inside voice, even in the middle of the night.
She can take a perfectly acceptable two year old activity and turn it into a nightmare. Fact: If you give her two felts *non toxic of course* with a picture to color and get her all set up in her high chair so she can't color on anything that will get ruined, she WILL suck all the color out of the markers and then bite the tip off the end.
She never stops talking. Ever. Even in her sleep.
My new word for her is spirited.
I get frustrated at her, I threaten spankings, I put her in her room, I take things away. I am consistent with discipline and I don't entertain the arguing, I stop it.
She fights with her friends and her cousins. While I would like to be that parent that thinks its always the other kids fault, I am no dummy. I know better.
I didn't think I would ever need the "excuse" shes two, but I am guilty of using it. I have no other explanation for her behavior sometimes. She will be fine one minute and a beast the next. And it's not learned behavior, trust me, I keep my beastiness in check!!
But then...
then she is kind and loving and gentle and quirky and funny.
She shares and says please and thank you without being asked. She says grown-up things and laughs at jokes. She asks thoughtful questions. She says sorry and means it.
She sings songs from her favorite movies and quotes characters like Simba and Dori. She learned what a best friend is thanks to the Lion King and often tells me I am her best friend.
She comes with a warning, but I do love her so.
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